Are you motivated by Fear or Love?

There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life. ∼ JOHN LENNON

What to do when someone triggers you…

A new awareness around being triggered…

  1. Become aware when you are being triggered.
  2. Put a name on it. Label it.
  3. How am I being like this to others or what can I learn from this?
  4. Own it, take responsibility and work through it.

In the past, when someone would do or say something that upset me or made me feel anxiety, fear, unheard, unseen, angry or frustrated, I would react and complain or get defensive.

Now that I better understand the concept of me creating my own reality and other people are just mirrors and reflections of me, I can take ownership and responsibility for my emotions.

They are ultimately there to help me learn, grow, and have a better understanding.

Now, instead of getting all pumped up when something like this happens, I just breathe and notice how I feel. So essentially, I am bringing awareness to the moment.

Then I have the opportunity to either give my power away or keep it, react or respond. If I react to the situation with anger, fear, or whatever, then I am giving my power away. This could cause an argument or power struggle. This is the part of my ego who feels hurt and only wants to be right, to be seen, heard, noticed, appreciated and so on.

Alternatively, if I look at it and call it out (gently), then I am responding to it. In this way I am able to feel the emotion run through my body yet remain calm and collected. No need to become defensive. This does not mean to become passive either. It’s just a neutral, safe place to stay in during the growth process.

Next I go within myself to see where I might be doing that to others. Usually it not so easily discovered but if I look deep enough, and am willing to accept the idea that I may be doing that to others, then my ego is exposed and the beauty of it is revealed!

The next step is to work with it as I move forward. Be gentle with myself as I practice the new way of responding.

There are many different aspects and situations that can come from this concept and I look forward to the challenge!

Life Coaching – Take a Chance

Life Coaching - Take a ChanceAs I read this very slowly and thought about it carefully, I realized it is so true! It all starts with making a choice which also means making a decision. That’s the first step, then the next step is taking action. The action is the chance you will take. Really, any time we decide to take action on anything we are taking a chance. We do it all day and may not even realize it. But here we are talking about taking bigger chances and more action. Yes, your life will always keep changing, at least in small ways but if you take bigger chances your life will change in bigger ways. What chance are you willing to take to get better results?

Expect miracles, Rebekah J Simpson

Life Coaching – Communicating from Within

Life Coach Quiet ListeningThere are three places that we can come  from when we are communicating with others, or making decisions.

1. Head, from this place we may be trying to rationalize situations, use intellect, process, analyze, and react. This is great for use in business.

2. Heart, When we are in our hearts, we are connecting, expressing love, compassion, sensitivity,  and sympathy. Sometimes it can be difficult to make decisions from the heart because we may be too sensitive or emotional and it could get in the way. This is great for use with loved ones.

3. Knowing, this is the place just below or behind our navel, our center, our gut feeling, also called our place of “chi”, and life source. This is where we go when we are seeking answers from within. Here we can only experience the truth of all things, a knowing of who we really are, why we are here, and how we can best serve all of humanity. From here we are able to respond to situations rather that react. It’s almost a sense of being in the present.

Our knowing is also the place where we receive goose bumps during a chilling situation or conversation. These are actually “Truth Bumps.” We can know, that when this happens, Spirit is present.

Exercise: Pause for a moment, count to five, take a couple of deep breaths and get centered. Then ask yourself which one of these three place are your current thoughts and decisions comming from. By doing this exercise several times throughout your day, you may find that your thoughts and decisioins will be more in alignment with your wants and desires.